Signs You’ve Been Orthodox a While

Signs You’ve Been Orthodox a While

by | Jun 11, 2023 | Uncategorized

1. You rank parishes by which one has the nicest incense. 2. When your kids are misbehaving, there’s this one old lady you’re afraid will come shush them even though you’ve forgotten she died ten years ago. 3. You’ve been guilty of the sin of...
Couple suffers discord over Orthodox ebooks

Couple suffers discord over Orthodox ebooks

by | Feb 1, 2023 | Uncategorized

After twenty years of wedded bliss living in a small apartment full of books, an Orthodox couple’s marriage has been challenged by the purchase of too many ebooks. At first, Emerentiana Wilson thought there was something wrong with her husband’s ebook...
Parish to observe Fourth of July on Old Calendar

Parish to observe Fourth of July on Old Calendar

by | Jul 3, 2022 | Uncategorized

  Dear Parish Members, As I’m sure you know, the Fourth of July always falls during the Apostles’ Fast for those of us who observe the Old Style Calendar. Bishop Vladikos made it clear at this year’s clergy retreat that he has gotten tired of getting requests for...
Exhausted faster just can’t Lent any longer

Exhausted faster just can’t Lent any longer

by | Apr 18, 2022 | Uncategorized

An extreme case of Lenten despair required intervention from friends and neighbors at Duwamish College last week. Anna-Marie Andrews, 21, was found in her dorm room with a recording of the Canon of St. Andrew of Crete at extreme death-metal volumes on her stereo. They...
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